Checking In Re: The Reading Schedule

Hi everyone!  We'll be heading into Chapter 4 this week and speaking about the value of critical awareness and the role it can play in the journey to Shame Resilience.

I wanted to check in and ask you all how you're feeling about the Reading Schedule we've been following - specifically, its pace.

Comments are dwindling - and I know there are many valid and even personal reasons for this. What I want to ensure is that our reading pace is not too aggressive, forcing people to drop out along the way because of embarrassment, disappointment or even shame that you're not able to keep up with others.

This is meaningful work. Whether or not you've read the chapter being discussed is no measure of who can or can't participate. As we're about to discuss this week - contextualizing to a big picture place can move us from overwhelm to a safer sense of self-involvement. This is emotional reading and it will be affecting us all in different ways. If following along as part of a compassionate group moves you from Shame to Resilience - then please continue with us, privately or 'out loud'. Just, stick with it.

Okay - back to the reading schedule. Looking ahead ~ I had previously grouped Chapters 5 & 6 together for next week's reading - that's 50 pages. Please let me know if this is managable and/or realistic -- or if you'd appreciate taking more time with the book than originally planned (we've already extended it by one week with the inclusion of last week's Gentle Pause) and approaching Chapters 5 and 6 separately over two weeks.

Chapters 5 and 6 speak to the final 2 elements of Shame Resilience, Reaching Out and Speaking Shame, respectively.

So, what do you think? Shall we read Chapters 5 & 6 together as planned? Or should we dedicate one week to each chapter? The floor is open for your thoughts and feelings ...

Read Along Starts Tomorrow!

Tomorrow Anj and I will be publishing the first post in our interactive I Thought It Was Just Me Read-Along.

Thank you so much for choosing to join us ~ I will be reading along with everyone else and fully expect this experience to be meaningful and perhaps even a turning point for me.

I thought I'd check in today, post the Reading Schedule, share a few 'ground rules' - and leave you with a song that fills me with Inspired Hope every time I hear it.

First, the Reading Schedule: Starting tomorrow -

Introduction - Wednesday February 10th
Chapter 1 (30 pages) - Wednesday February 17th
Chapter 2 (37 pages) - Wednesday February 24th
Chapter 3 (22 pages) - Wednesday March 3rd
Chapter 4 (28 pages) - Wednesday March 17th
Chapter 5 (33 pages) - Wednesday March 24th
Chapter 6 (17 pages) - Wednesday March 31st
Chapter 7 (38 pages) - Wednesday April 7th
Chapter 8 (28 pages) - Wednesday April 14th
Chapter 9 (29 pages) - Wednesday April 21st
Chapter 10 (14 pages) - Wednesday April 28th

Each Wednesday, Anjanette or I will publish a discussion-oriented blog post and/or video post and/or creative exercise before opening up the comment thread for sharing as people feel comfortable. How much you choose to reveal or not reveal will always be completely up to you.

Brene Brown has a few guidelines for the process of Our Journey Together that are worth noting here ~ I think honouring them will lead to respectful and meaningful interaction.

1. It's best if you can work through the book with a friend. Our on-line community is wonderful but it's not a substitute for our "in the flesh" connections. If you feel like you need someone to help you through the material, consider talking to a mental health professional in your area. I heart my therapist.

2. Write, write, write. Writing is the key to turning knowledge into transformation. I really encourage you to leave comments, try keeping a journal, and participate in the creativity exercises. I wish I would have done it earlier in my own work.

3. Let go of the need to be unique and/or to fit in. If you want to leave a comment that's already been left 30 times - DO IT! That's how we know we're not alone. If you want to say something that hasn't been said - DO IT! Courage rocks.

4. Comparative suffering hurts everyone. No shame story is too small or insignificant. Compassion is not finite - there's enough to go around.

5. Practice empathy and compassion in the comments. Let go of judgment and advice.

6. Practice boundaries. Share openly but understand that this is a public space and confidentiality is an issue.

Once again, thank you so much for joining us in this Read Along. Brene's work is sooo important ~ and we are truly blessed that her time, wisdom and generosity seems to be boundless.

I dedicate this video, and more importantly, the message it contains, to all of us venturing on this Journey together. You can stop it at 3 minutes, 5 seconds. See you all tomorrow!

Worthiness + Rest from Brené

Hi everyone,

I've been following along and I have to say that PNN is a community like no other.

Sally and Anj are wonderful facilitators - wise, vulnerable and warm. It's been amazing to watch this read-along unfold and see the level of support and caring in the comments.

When I facilitated the read-along on my blog, we hit a similar place around Chapter 4. My readers felt it and I felt it.

Our lives are so busy that finding time to do soul work (especially shame resilience work) is difficult. It's also hard to read and process on a schedule. We all have our own timeline for healing.

I want to encourage you to stay connected - even if you stop reading. Shame happens between people and it heals between people. You don't need to read to connect and/or leave comments. Showing up is enough. We are enough.

We celebrated a Week of Worthiness on the Ordinary Courage blog last week. It was pretty amazing. Over 100 bloggers wrote about worthiness and I gave away 3 copies of my new DVD, "The Hustle for Worthiness."

If there's one thing I learned from last week, it's how much we need to rest, take our time, and hold space for change.

To celebrate our worthiness, I want to give away two copies of the DVD to this read-along community. Just leave a comment with this sentence:

I am enough.

It's an honor to make this journey with you! Sit strong.

Let's get started...

Imagine – a life where you don’t fall asleep to a slew of “should’s”, that you don’t spend extra time mentally replaying all your perceived mistakes, that you can fully embrace your authentic self and live each day without reserve.  I don’t know about you, but I think that sounds pretty brilliant! 

Our much anticipated read-along will begin on February 10^th as we start to read together and work through some of the incredible exercises that Brene has created for us. 

So please, get your copy of I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t), invite a friend (or two!)  and join us for an amazing journey...

Are you ready for Chapter One?

On Wednesday, we'll start discussing Chapter One:Understanding Shame.

This chapter really got me thinking (or should I say, feeling - or more honestly, both).

In this chapter, Brene lays the foundation with a working definition of Shame, crafted from heart-felt research. We learn about the Shame Web, how Fear and Blame play a role in Shame's emergence, the quandary of Power and the crippling aspects of psychological isolation.

So much 'hit me' while reading this chapter ~ and I felt an intense need to reach out to you all -- and let you know that through this process, here with us ~ you are not alone.

Here, we are connected by a desire to dig deep, to understand and/or confront a potential aspect of ourselves with entrenched roots - and the courage to develop resiliency because on some level ... we know that we are worth it. (Or perhaps, right now - we just hope we are.)

Anj and I will publish Chapter One's post on Wednesday. In the meantime, please feel this song in the very core of your being. Please do - because, it's true. Regardless of where you are on the shame spectrum today ~ you truly are, Beautiful.

Staying connected ...

Hi everyone! (It's Sally.)

I've been thinking about the aspects of ourselves that we push down deep, the parts we try really hard to keep from rising in the light of day - things we really feel shamed, embarrassed or in denial about.

I'm looking forward to venturing through Brene's book together as a compassionate, healing and supportive team. And I had a thought that I wanted to share - a thought that I believe is true, and that I hope will make this journey easier for all of us, together.

When we think of our shame, embarrassment, need for perfection, etc. as our enemy ~ as the dark shadow that will hurt us beyond imagining if we don't stay on top of it ... we remain somewhat fearful of it.

But, what if we thought of it as a coping mechanism - something we put in place to protect us, when we didn't know better ... when survival at all costs was our motivating driver ~ and this was the best we could do?

I invite you to listen to this. Turn up the volume, click the Play arrow, close your eyes and imagine that your deepest hidden fear/shame/embarrassment is singing to you.

Imagine it was never there to hurt you at all -- and that it understands you are not the person you were back then, and that release is possible.

Imagine that your worst fear about yourself - was actually a poorly manifested act of Love. And now it knows that you have moved on, and so - it's willing to walk away.

Click play, close your eyes, and imagine. Much love ...

We hope you will join us!

Hi everyone! Anj (writergrrl) and I have created this site page to serve as the platform for our Read Along Discussions of Brene Brown's Book I Thought It Was Just Me.

We will both be accessing this site as administrators ~ and we'll either post our pictures so you know who has posted, or we'll indicate in words who has written the post's content (when we forget to post our pictures).

Once the discussion gets going and comment streams begin to flow ~ we'll comment as ourselves from our own accounts. (Sure hope I don't screw this up -- the ultimate irony in a discussion about perfectionism, really.)

Anj and I will connect this week and work out an actual launch date to officially get the Read Along started. It will be sometime in early February ~ and it will operate in the same manner as the Authenticity Workshop hosted by Brene Brown here late last year. Anj and/or I will post something thought-provoking at the beginning of each chapter to get the discussion going, and then we'll all participate as we feel comfortable to do so in the comment sections that follow.

Very clear and specific details will be provided soon.

In the meantime, if this is something you think you'd like to participate in ~ get your copy of the book and know that this journey we'll take through its chapters will be worth the time invested in doing so.

My name is Sally and I'm feeling really honoured to be co-facilitating this adventure with Anj - and so grateful that Brene Brown will be joining us from time to time to enrich the discussion as well.

So what say you? Are you ready to seize this one moment in time?

UPDATE: EXCITING NEWS!!!

Brene Brown has just announced that she is celebrating the launch of this Read Along with the give-away of 5 copies of her book I Thought It Was Just Me!

To enter your name to potentially win a free copy of this Read Along book, visit her website by clicking here, and leave a comment after reading Brene's blog post.

Thanks Brene!!